Benefits of Mangosteen

BENEFITS OF MANGOSTEEN

 You don’t see a lot of fat people in Southeast Asia.

That’s one of the benefits of mangosteen.  There might not be many benefits to actually living in Southeast Asia but if you did, chances are you wouldn’t be fat.

Another of the benefits of mangosteen – if you can find it stateside – is it’s damn pretty. White and sweet on the inside, red and smooth on the outside.  Hey if we could find a blue part of the mangosteen it would be a patriotic fruit.

Do we have a national fruit?

One of the benefits of mangosteen – as well as living in a developed country – is that “they” – whoever “they” are – have found some kind of industrial way to puree the whole dang fruit.

Benefits of Mangosteen

I can’t stand food that is hard to get to.  Hard outer shells, messy innards.  Nah.  If I have to fight the damn thing to eat it, forget it. Like eating crabs with the freaking bibs and hammers and whatnot .

Not so much now with mangosteen because other people take the mess out.

I like that.  I’m not an elitist or anything but if someone else could deal with the mess and just give me the benefits of mangosteen I’m good.  A little lazy, and yeah, maybe a little elitist.

Can those mangosteen industrialists clean my house too?

Back to the not-fat people of Southeast Asia where this weird fruit is aplenty.  Guess what the geeks in the nutrition labs are finding out?  That this mangosteen stuff is a KICK ASS anti-oxidant! An anti-oxidant gets the toxic crap outta you and believe me, it’s a dirty world, friend. So anti-oxidants are important.

You want healthy stuff that gets the toxins OUT. Like you know how you’re hearing all this stuff about drinking tons of green tea for the anti-oxidant?  Well guess what, I can only drink so much tea.

Makes me pee too much and who has time?

But get this, only 2 ounces of Vemma equals as much anti-oxidant in your system as gallons of green tea. Two ounces versus two gallons.  You don’t have to be a freaking mathematician to figure out what’s less liquid and ergo (that’s Latin, brother, for “therefore.” Just want to see if you’re listening) fewer visits to the can to whiz.

Here’s where my wife would start talking about how a man can whiz anywhere and geez, the “whole world’s his toilet” and how there are always long lines at the ladies room blah blah.  All of this is true. We’re just more fortunate to have less worry about privacy, I guess, but still I don’t want to be stopping the car to pee on the expressway because I drank a gallon of freaking green tea.

Rather just have my Vemma shooter.

Vemma bottles

Some docs are saying we should drink mangosteen more regularly than orange juice!  Wow, orange juice is like some kind of sacred icon of breakfast juices so for them to put this mangosteen whipper-snapper up against the OJ, that is something, ok?

We should pay attention. Pass the mangosteen, Mama. And yes, the whole world’s my toilet.